Posted on

Reader says , “It is against the law to commit anyone involuntarily unless he/she is a danger to him/herself or to others”

17758482 674194916099878 5468265401284820757 o

file photo by Boyd Loving

“As several posters said, “We’ve offered help. He doesn’t want it.” It is against the law to commit anyone involuntarily unless he/she is a danger to him/herself or to others. Some people are so disturbed that they just want to be left alone. He’s not standing in the street begging, is he? When it gets hotter, or colder, he may decide he can use some help and will accept it then. It is also against the law to publicly urinate or defecate. We could legally have him picked up, and then what? The United States has lots of agencies designed to help people such as this. But they have to be willing to take the help. There used to be a drop in center, run privately by donations, to help mentally disturbed people with no questions asked in Hackensack. They lost their lease–but they couldn’t have helped this man. Homeless shelters will take him for a month unless he is an addict or is constantly drunk. There are actually some small shelters for those people. He is probably a result of NJ choosing to close psychiatric hospitals and throw their residents onto the public for assistance. I well know that I am not offering any solution to his presence. In reality, with the law the way it is, there is no solution. He most likely was living on the streets in another community and was literally picked up and dumped here. Someone mentioned that the “Black Lives Matter” group could take a real Black and, with much constant effort and concern be able to help him understand that he needs help and find help for him. That would certainly be a more fruitful use of their time than blocking streets and traffic and expecting everyone else in the world “to see it their way.” But, this group seems to be interested in making noise and proving that their “rights” can do away with others rights as they –think, not know, as they assume–that they are “educated” “with it” etc. What was the quote about nothing is achieved if it is only sought “through sound and fury”? That does seem to be all that they are capable of doing. They are young, yes, and the young always know what is best for the world until they are forced to quit living “in the world as they want it” and accept “the world that really exists today”.  “

Posted on

Reader asks why Americans have such a propensity to abuse drugs?


A lot more research should be done to figure out why Americans have such a propensity to abuse drugs. In most countries, people have access to prescription drugs without needing a prescription. I was recently in Mexico and you can walk into any drug store and buy oxy and Percocet easily. Yet, Mexico is not facing an epidemic like we are. The problem here is and always has been a demand problem, not a supply problem. Why is that? Is life so terrible here that we need to numb ourselves? Or have we been coddled to the point of ignoring the notion of personal responsibilit?. How many bulimics are there in the third world?

Posted on

How To Help Children Stay Off The Naughty List Year-Round


October 28,2016

the staff of the Ridgewood blog

Ridgewood NJ, It’s that time of year again when beleaguered parents constantly remind disobedient children that it’s more important than ever to do the right thing.

Otherwise, they could end up on Santa’s notorious naughty list – the one specially reserved for kids who fight with siblings, refuse to do their homework, throw temper tantrums and don’t eat their vegetables.

While banishment to the naughty list has long been a handy tool in the disciplinary arsenal, any responsible parent wants their children to be good the rest of the year, too, when the threat of empty stockings holds less sway over those impressionable minds.

“I suspect most children deep down want to do the right thing, but they struggle with temptation,” says K.J. Hales, author of It’s Hard to Be Good, the first volume in the Ellie the Wienerdog ( series of educational picture books for children.

“A lot of it comes down to self-control – being able to control both your emotions and your actions when things don’t go your way or you don’t get what you want.”

Hales, who creates teachers’ guides and educational activities to go along with the lessons in her books, says the earlier parents start teaching children to do the right thing, the better.

She says some of the ways they can reinforce good behavior and discourage bad behavior include:

• Be generous with praise. Don’t underestimate the importance of your words. It’s easy to notice when children do the wrong thing and to chastise them about it. But take note when they do the right thing, too, and praise their good choices or good behavior.  “Everyone loves words of approval and children will want to please you as a result,” Hales says.
• Make good choices a fun activity. One way to encourage good decisions could be to set aside one week in which each day you ask your children to write or draw about a good decision they made or they saw someone else make. Hales says this is an activity she suggests for classroom teachers, but it can work in the home as well. Be sure to discuss those good decisions with the children.
• Reward them. Discipline so often focuses on punishments for bad behavior, but children should also be rewarded for good behavior. This doesn’t have to be anything elaborate or expensive. A reward could be a picnic in the park or a favorite dessert after dinner.

“I’m sure every parent wants their child to gain independence, grow emotionally and learn to make good decisions about their own behavior,” Hales says. “And this is important 365 days a year, not just in the weeks before Santa Claus comes to town.”

About K.J. Hales

K.J. Hales ( is author of the Ellie the Wienerdog series of educational children’s books for children. The first volume in the series is It’s Hard to Be Good. The Ellie character is based on Hales’ own dachshund also named Ellie.

Posted on

Psychologist: ‘Authoritative Parenting’ is Best for Children

school kids

Is it time for parents to return to a position of loving but firm authority figures?
Annie Holmquist | April 14, 2016

Several months ago, Dr. Leonard Sax made headlines when he proposed that the lack of discipline we see in America today is simply the surface symptom of a greater problem: the decline of parental authority.

Dr. Sax’s theories were recently underscored by psychologist Lisa Damour in a New York Times piece on the benefits of family dinner time. Although the benefits of family dinners are regularly touted, Ms. Damour wonders how they produce such positive effects when a family often sits down exhausted to a silent and non-interactive meal together. Her answer is thought-provoking:

Posted on

“This is not a day care, This is a university!”

animal house

We couldn’t agree with this more!

A letter from our Wesleyan Church College President, in Bartlesville Oklahoma.

In the face of college students far and wide complaining about emotional “triggers” they see and hear, annexing “safe spaces” where opposing views can’t hurt their feelings and even threatening free speech, Everett Piper is seemingly fed up with it all.

The president of Oklahoma Wesleyan University began his recent open letter to students with a story it appears he could hardly believe himself.
“This past week, I actually had a student come forward after a university chapel service and complain because he felt ‘victimized’ by a sermon on the topic of 1 Corinthians 13,” Piper explained in his letter posted to the school’s website.
“It appears that this young scholar felt offended because a homily on love made him feel bad for not showing love! In his mind, the speaker was wrong for making him, and his peers, feel uncomfortable.” And with that, Piper apparently had enough.
“I’m not making this up,” he continued. “Our culture has actually taught our kids to be this self-absorbed and narcissistic! Any time their feelings are hurt, they are the victims! Anyone who dares challenge them and, thus, makes them ‘feel bad’ about themselves, is a ‘hater,’ a ‘bigot,’ an ‘oppressor,’ and a ‘victimizer.'”
Piper went on to explain to students that the familiar feeling of “discomfort” when confronted with wrongdoing is called a “conscience” — and that the “goal of many a good sermon is to get you to confess your sins–not coddle you in your selfishness” or help you achieve “self-actualization.”
More from Piper:
If you want the chaplain to tell you you’re a victim rather than tell you that you need virtue, this may not be the university you’re looking for. If you want to complain about a sermon that makes you feel less than loving for not showing love, this might be the wrong place.
If you’re more interested in playing the “hater” card than you are in confessing your own hate; if you want to arrogantly lecture, rather than humbly learn; if you don’t want to feel guilt in your soul when you are guilty of sin; if you want to be enabled rather than confronted, there are many universities across the land (in Missouri and elsewhere) that will give you exactly what you want, but Oklahoma Wesleyan isn’t one of them.
At OKWU, we teach you to be selfless rather than self-centered. We are more interested in you practicing personal forgiveness than political revenge. We want you to model interpersonal reconciliation rather than foment personal conflict. We believe the content of your character is more important than the color of your skin. We don’t believe that you have been victimized every time you feel guilty and we don’t issue “trigger warnings” before altar calls.
“This is not a day care,” Piper concluded. “This is a university!”

Posted on

New York court rules that spanking kids is ‘a reasonable use of force’


time for a revolution? 

New York court rules that spanking kids is ‘a reasonable use of force’
July 21, 2014

LONG ISLAND, N.Y. – A New York appellate court last week ruled in favor of a father who was accused of child abuse for spanking his 8-year-old son after the child misbehaved at a friend’s party.

A Suffolk County Family Court previously determined the father, who was not named in a recent New York Daily News report, abused his son “by inflicting excessive corporal punishment” for spanking his son at a friend’s party in 2012 after the child cursed at an adult.

But a Long Island appellate court judge last week overturned the ruling, and determined the child’s punishment “was a reasonable use of force,” according to the news site.

“The father’s open-handed spanking of the child as a form of discipline after he heard the child curse at an adult was a reasonable use of force and, under the circumstances presented here, did not constitute excessive corporal punishment,” according to the ruling cited by the Daily News.

Aside from the punishment at the party, the complaint alleges the father also repeatedly struck the child with a belt on the butt, legs and arms when the family returned home, but the father denied those allegations and the appellate court could not find sufficient evidence to uphold that charge, the news site reports.

Posted on

Battle of the Brats : Teen suing parents rages at ‘spoiled’ baby boomers


Battle of the Brats : Teen suing parents rages at ‘spoiled’ baby boomers
By Alex Dickinson, Tara Palmeri and Jeane MacIntosh
March 7, 2014 | 9:01am

The New Jersey parents being sued for tuition by their entitled teenager were excoriated in a Friday rant on her new Facebook page as “spoiled” baby boomers who would rather feather a retirement nest than pay their kids’ college bills.

“I have been stunned by the financial greed of modern parents who are more concerned with retiring into some fantasy world rather than provide for their children’s college and young adult years,” a poster — presumed to be Morris Catholic HS senior Rachel Canning or a supporter — wrote in the pre-dawn web screed.

“Suburban baby boomer types are the spoiled lot, they make massive amount of money a year, they are used to flying to luxury destinations when they want, and buy things that they don’t need, people should be inclined to see things my way.”