Marriages are difficult, and with all of the pressures of modern life, it is no wonder that so many relationships are strained to the point of breaking. From long working hours to everything that goes into raising children, there are so many potential points of tension that it is completely natural to have some healthy friction in a relationship. Unfortunately, as rising divorce rates show, there are some occasions when these issues inflate to a point of no return. As with anything else in life, it is always more effective to address problems in a relationship early rather than leaving them to fester. Marriage counseling has been proven to be an effective tool for helping many couples to repair their relationship, but how do you know if your marriage has reached that point.
Here are 6 signs that you might need marriage counseling.
1. Points Scoring
Relationships are built on teamwork, and whilst many couples enjoy a little healthy competition, one telltale sign that your relationship is in trouble is when you start scoring points against each other. If you come to the realization that you are always trying to feel like “the winner” in your relationship, then marriage counseling may be a good idea. There are many marriage counselors practicing and you can click here to see one who may be able to help your relationship if you and your partner have started trying to score points. There are a sad number of people in relationships who will deliberately instigate arguments just to try and feel like they have got one over on their partner but, in the end, everyone ends up losing.
2. Different Dreams
When you fall in love with someone, it is because you have met the perfect person at the perfect time. Had you met them at any other time or place in your life, you may not have had the same attraction to them as you would have both been completely different people. The curves of our lives don’t suddenly stop when we meet someone and so many couples find that after a few years they just want different things. In this situation, marriage counseling can help you and your spouse decide whether these conflicting dreams are something that can be compromised on or whether you need to chase these dreams separately.
3. Unhealthy Sex Life
In most marriages, it is only natural that the sexual flame between married couples starts to wane a bit. Whilst this is totally normal, only the two people within a relationship really know if something feels off in their sex life. The stresses of busy lives and the natural depletion of libido as we get older can explain a common drop off in sex between partners, but if you notice significant changes in your sex life, then a marriage counselor can help you to discuss these issues in a safe and non-judgemental place.
4. Frequent Arguments
The honeymoon period of a relationship often seems like it will never end, but every couple has their natural disagreements. Whilst this is a normal part of any healthy marriage when arguments start becoming more frequent, and particularly when they start becoming nastier, this is a surefire sign that there are problems in your relationship.
5. Loss of Respect
Every relationship, whether it is a marriage or a friendship, is built on respect. It is so important that you respect your partner’s wishes and feelings, and recognize their many attributes. It is very difficult to sustain a marriage once that respect is gone as it often leads to nastiness and condescension. An experienced marriage counselor will be able to get to the bottom of why you have lost respect for your partner and try to rebuild it again.
6. Loss of Trust
As with respect, trust is absolutely key to any successful relationship and if you lose that trust it can be so difficult to get it back again. Two people in a marriage need to be able to rely on each other and have faith that their partner will not betray them. Adultery is one of the biggest causes of divorce as it can be very hard to trust someone after they have cheated on you. A marriage counselor will talk with you about what happened and see if there is anything that can still be salvaged.
Everyone who has ever been married knows that it is not all rainbows and butterflies. Every marriage has its own set of difficulties and it often takes hard work to sustain a successful relationship. If you are having difficulties in your marriage, it is vital to be open and honest with your partner, as this is the only way to truly understand where you are at in your relationship. If you are experiencing any of these signs, it may be worthwhile booking some time with a marriage counselor to see if they can help you to move in together.
As soon as I see dishes like the sink it’s all over.