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Respectful behavior should go both ways

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file photo by Boyd Loving

Respectful behavior should go both ways

DECEMBER 5, 2014    LAST UPDATED: FRIDAY, DECEMBER 5, 2014, 12:31 AM
THE RIDGEWOOD NEWS

To the Editor:

On Nov. 24, the mayor held a meeting on civility. It appears that attendance was by invitation only, but because we are a small village, the word got out rather quickly. I wonder what the true purpose of this meeting was.

It seems the first thing that one would do if there was a perceived problem is to hold a public meeting so that all interested parties could attend and that all our council members would be included. Transparency is at the heart of all public discourse. If conduct at sporting events is an issue, then where were all the participants? As long as I have lived, there has always been an occasional out-of-control parent and/or coach, but I don’t see it as a new issue or one particular to Ridgewood.

To another point, I have attended and ran many meetings and hardly ever has civility been a problem. Where I have seen a breakdown of civility is at the council level, when at the dais personal attacks have been directed at other council members. We have guidelines to prevent this, Robert’s Rules of Order and the Open Public Meetings Act, but they were not always followed, and some meetings became very contentious.

Also, as a citizen coming to the microphone, it is an intimidating experience. It is very difficult to express a contrary opinion in such a setting. On rare occasions, a speaker may get personal, but the chairperson can properly silence that with a reminder of meeting protocol. But how do we stop it when it is coming the other way?

Last, while I have never observed a lack of civility at the Board of Education meetings, I believe its policy of not responding in any way to speakers at the microphone is incredibly rude. As one speaker recently said, it is like talking in a vacuum and the silence is deafening.

We elect our council and board members. We believe in a representative government. Public meetings need to be open and inclusive. As tax-paying residents of the village, we need to feel that are voices are being heard. Respectful behavior goes both ways.

Linda McNamara

Ridgewood

https://www.northjersey.com/opinion/opinion-letters-to-the-editor/letter-respectful-behavior-should-go-both-ways-1.1146805

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Reader says Criticism and the resulting public discourse, I believe, does much more good than harm

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Reader says Criticism and the resulting public discourse, I believe, does much more good than harm

I am a strong believer in free speech no matter how stupid, hateful, or unpopular that speech is, but I suppose if you twisted my arm I could compromise and allow bans on one form of speech. That would be blowhard elected officials singlehandedly defying the New Jersey State Sunshine Law by egotistically grabbing the public microphone (!) and executing one of the most exquisite, hypocritical, logic-twisting, irony-defining, triple-twister-with-a-backflip dives into the capacious pool of numbnutted man-child foolishness imaginable by breezily calling for censorship and limits on free speech – which I find hateful and “excessively objectionable.”

I’m just kidding of course, because by allowing people to express their wrongheaded opinions at imprudently-convened unofficially official privately public meetings, you are giving others a chance to respond to and criticize those ideas (see: these comments). The resulting public discourse, I believe, does much more good than harm. And although some mistakenly claim that restrictions on free speech are unlikely to be abused in Orwellian and Authoritarian ways in the USA (what with our infallible government and all), you’ll find plenty of such instances from the last century of American history alone.

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Reader says Yard Signs are Hate Speech ?

Valleywood_theridgewoodblog.net_12

Reader says Yard Signs are Hate Speech ?

James, I think people here are really more eager just to ban “hate lawn-signs”.

Ridgewood blog asks  what qualifies as “Hate Lawn Signs” lol

Any lawn sign that criticizes a regionally significant inherently beneficial use of otherwise tax-revenue-generating chunk of real estate is a “hate lawn sign”.

your views are repulsive, and I am ashamed of you for propagating them. There are no “sensible restrictions on free speech,” and whoever thinks that stifling speech eliminates hatred, anger, and violence, is plainly wrong. The answer to hate speech is more speech, not less.

By the way, anyone who wishes to cling to “fire in a crowded theater,” just remember that the ruling was used to imprison Yiddish-speaking pacifists for handing out fliers to protest World War I. Is that “sensible,” #16?

brought to you courtesy of one of our nation’s finest institutions of higher learning (much more where that came from):

https://thedartmouth.com/2014/11/17/opinion/traynor-fixing-free-speech

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Reader says People post and make comment on this blog when they want their cause championed but turn around and condemn this blog when they don’t need it anymore

ValleyYellowSign

Reader says People post and make comment on this blog when they want their cause championed but turn around and condemn this blog when they don’t need it anymore

Mayor Paul Aronsohn,Councilwoman Gwenn Hauck hosted the meeting and , Deputy Mayor Albert Pucciarelli, made comments. Well it sound like an open public meeting which was not posted in a timely manner ( Friday for a Monday Meeting) The next questions. Were there meeting minutes taken and if so when will they be available to the public?

“Baney also called out The Ridgewood Blog, a news and opinion aggregation website, for contributing to incivility.” Baney Who is a member of the anti Valley Hospital group had no problem when commenter on this blog blasted Valley Hospital. Where was she the?. These people are all cut from the same cloth.

Baney also called out The Ridgewood Blog, a news and opinion aggregation website, for contributing to incivility.

James you know what ironic. People send thing for you to post and make comment on this blog when they want their cause championed but turn around and condemn this blog when they don’t need it anymore or they disagree with other posters. Which ever way the wind is blowing like the Three Amigos.

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Reader suggests that if the Mayor would start representing the interest of Ridgewood the blog would be irrelevant

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file photo by Boyd Loving

Reader suggests that if the Mayor would start representing the interest of Ridgewood the blog would be irrelevant 

the 3 clowns Huey, Dewey, and Louie should focus on representing tax payers ,residents and the interests of Ridgewood and then people would not be criticizing them on this blog 24/7 .

Ridgewood is not Hudson County , nor do we have the demographic , Ridgewood is Ridgewood , best to pack up the Hudson County mafia and your developer friends and move back ..

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Reader suggest “Civility ” meeting was violation of NJ Open Public Meetings Act

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file photo Boyd Loving

Reader suggest “Civility ” meeting was violation of NJ Open Public Meetings

Wait just a Ridgewood minute – Mayor Paul Aronsohn, Deputy Mayor Albert Pucciarelli, and Councilwoman Gwenn Hauck all participated in this meeting. Isn’t that considered a quorum in terms of the Village Council? If so, why wasn’t this billed as an offical meeting of the Council, with minutes taken and legal notice given? A violation of the NJ Open Public Meetings Act or not? Matt Rogers where are you?

Ms Hauck has been counted before even when she was not present  . It is my understanding that there were two member of the council  hosting the meeting on civility last Monday. What is confusing is that the Deputy Mayor was in the audience and even took part in the conversation so I been told. If true does this now become a official public meeting  which should have been post in a timely manner ( not on Friday for a Mondaymeeting? ) Where there minuets taken and will they be available?  Can someone shed some light on this. Did the Deputy Mayor speak ?

But the Deputy Mayor only introduced himself  we are told , but its the spirit of the law that is still of concern?

Of course Mr. Pucciarelli was there, he is attached by a firm cable to Mr. Arohsohn Mr Arohsohn should keep his ATTACK DOG on a shorter leash. So was not the purpose of the Deputy Mayors presence to quell dissent , and intimidate people ?

The Deputy Mayor cannot for one moment pretend ignorance of the Sunshine Law. His adherence to the law was called into question early in his term – this gave him plenty of time to learn the law that he had been accused of breaking. The Village Attorney looked into the matter and decided that the DM had not violated the law at that time. Regardless, Mr. Pucciarelli knew full well that he should not speak last Monday night, but……………surprise surprise………….he spoke! Presto, the law was broken.

s

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Reader says “Civility” meeting, What a bunch of nonsense.

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file photo Boyd Loving

Reader says  “Civility” meeting, What a bunch of nonsense.

The mayor is simply taking a page out of the resident’s playbook, calling for civility only after he and his minions have already distorted the public discourse, intimidated or demonized well-meaning political opponents, and generally done the damage he intends to do.

Even this event is nothing more than a belligerent shot across the bow to those who would come to public meetings in the future and dare to voice a contrary view at the public microphone, or otherwise level any well-deserved criticism the Mayor’s way.
To his mind, now that we’ve gone and taken the trouble of having a silly public meeting about the need for ‘civility in public discourse’, we have established a new norm, in accordance with which anyone who goes to the microphone to disagree with or criticize the Mayor or his friends is, by definition, engaging in a social ‘taboo’, and will therefore have voluntarily opened themselves up to immediate public abuse from the elected official DuJour, shamelessly served with a culturally toxic side-dish of relish, impunity, and maddening condescension.

Problem solved!

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Love Love Love and more Love

Ridgewood_-Village_Hall_theridgewoodblog.net_17

Different IP sample ,more of the same ,sad ,lonely and  pathetic ….

The Mayor will host a meeting on civility in our public discourse Monday, November 24 at 7:30pm in Village Hall, why cant we all just get along?

The Mayor Paul Aronsohn will host a meeting on civility in our public discourse on Monday, November 24, 7:30pm at Village Hall, and the Ridgewood blog asks, “why cant we all just get along?”  all day Monday join the conversation !

Specifically, the Mayor would like to begin a community-wide conversation about ways in which we can elevate public discourse and improve the way in which people publicly treat each other … whether it be at a Council meeting … on a ball field … in an online discussion … or anywhere else.

the entire day will be sponsored by MrBeer

 

anonymous
104.161.12.228
Submitted on 2014/11/18 at 7:55 pm

Yes # 10 but there are also some home grown one here also.

Yea like the guy who runs this blog

SCOTT SELDERS OF RIDGEWOOD CHARGED WITH POSSESSION OF CHILD PORNOGRAPHY
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Select comment anonymous
104.161.12.228
Submitted on 2014/11/18 at 1:43 pm

Come on foytlin just admit it you are a 1st class ASSHOLE, just admit it.

IMPORTANT NOTICE CONCERNING VILLAGE OF RIDGEWOOD LEAF REMOVAL – REVISED SCHEDULE
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Select comment anonymous
104.161.12.228
Submitted on 2014/11/18 at 1:39 pm

Come on foytlin just admit it you are a 1st class ASSHOLE, just admit it.

Reader says Mr. Aronsohn’s, Mr. Pucciarelli’s and Mrs. Hauck’s continue to behave as though “rules are for others”.
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Select comment anonymous
104.161.12.228
Submitted on 2014/11/18 at 9:32 am

Hey jimmy boy how are you doing? Still being a big ASSHOLE I see. But then what else would we expect from you.

Reader says Mr. Aronsohn’s, Mr. Pucciarelli’s and Mrs. Hauck’s continue to behave as though “rules are for others”.
21 View Post
Select comment anonymous
104.161.12.228
Submitted on 2014/11/17 at 5:17 pm

Hey jimmy boy how are you doing? Still being a big ASSHOLE I see. But then what else would we expect from you.

Crisis helped to improve Port Authority bus terminal
3 View Post
Select comment anonymous
104.161.12.228
Submitted on 2014/11/17 at 4:30 pm

Hey jimmy boy how are you doing? Still being a big ASSHOLE I see. But then what else would we expect from you.

Planning Board Amendment to Meeting Schedule – November 17th
10 View Post
Select comment anonymous
104.161.12.228
Submitted on 2014/11/14 at 7:36 am

Good morning ASSHOLE foytlin, how the fuck are you today?

Ridgewood Police Department : Resident Vehicle Identification stickers
0 View Post
Select comment Anonymous
104.161.12.228
Submitted on 2014/11/12 at 10:08 pm

Hey Jimmy boy foytlin….why do you still refuse to admit you are the Village ASSHOLE?

Drug sweep at Ridgewood High School
24 View Post
Select comment Anonymous
104.161.12.228
Submitted on 2014/11/11 at 9:46 pm

The only Moron here is jimmy boy foytlin. AKA as the Village ASSHOLE.

The 70’s Generation the Generation that never made it….
12 View Post

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Ridgewood to hold public discussion on civility in society

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Chris Harris Puff Piece : Ridgewood to hold public discussion on civility in society

NOVEMBER 24, 2014    LAST UPDATED: MONDAY, NOVEMBER 24, 2014, 1:21 AM
BY CHRIS HARRIS
STAFF WRITER |
THE RECORD

RIDGEWOOD — Mayor Paul Aronsohn will lead a public discussion tonight on the overall need for more civility in society.

“I’ve been in municipal government for more than six years and most of the time there’s a good exchange that happens — whether people agree or disagree,” Aronsohn said. “But there’s this certain level of hostility that sometimes takes the conversation in a bad place.”

Tonight’s event also will feature Councilwoman Gwenn Hauck, the Rev. Jan Philips of the Religious Society of Friends and Rabbi David Fine of Temple Israel.

Aronsohn said that during his years in municipal government, he’s seen coarseness be a distraction and watched as people berate experts testifying at public meetings. He has fielded complaints from parents, who sometimes deal with incivility on athletic fields, and he’s seen the issue pop up in online comments on articles reporting on village news.

“It’s good and fine to disagree, but we should be able to disagree without being disagreeable,” Aronsohn said. “I don’t want to sound Pollyanna-ish, but there has to be a better way to do this.”

https://www.northjersey.com/community-news/civility-in-society-is-topic-of-ridgewood-meeting-1.1140233

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Reader says If the Mayor and his Amigos invited everyone that they have be uncivil to they would have to rent out MetLife Stadium

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Reader says If the Mayor and his Amigos invited everyone that they have be uncivil to they would have to rent out MetLife Stadium

Did the mayor personally invite Tom Riche, Bernie Walsh, Ken Gabbert, and John Ward to this feel good session?

The meeting sounds like it could be a good one. I would like to see former Council members return to commenters microphone and share their views on today’s happenings.

“And how about Tony Merlino, Steve Sanzari, Marcia Ringel…..surely he invited them since he has always been so civil toward them.”

If the Mayor and his Amigos invited everyone that they have be uncivil to they would have to rent out MetLife Stadium

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Reader says the Council is uncivil and obnoxious as ever

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Reader says the Council is uncivil and obnoxious as ever

Great photo! That is at the Jul 1 reorg meeting.m Lorraine Reynolds is at the podium asking them in very strong terms to make Susan Knudsen the Deputy Mayor, per a long standing tradition that the highest vote getter have this position. Nope, no way. They did not even respond to Lorraine, and of course the Deputy Ego went on to maintain his title with a scratchy unintelligible vote skyped in from a safari with the duke. The people had spoken loudly, they wanted Sedon and Knudsen. And our elected morons ignored us swiftly.

The choice of photo is ironic, it is the Council being as uncivil and obnoxious as ever.

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Reader says Forget it Mr. Mayor. You have set the tone with your horrible group of three, you guys are nasty and vindictive, way WAY worse than anyone who speaks up at meetings.

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file photo Boyd Loving

Reader says Forget it Mr. Mayor. You have set the tone with your horrible group of three, you guys are nasty and vindictive, way WAY worse than anyone who speaks up at meetings.

This thing stinks on so many levels.

1. The mayor has absolutely no right to tell us how to speak, unless of course threats are made or profanity is used. Other than that, we as US citizens can say what we want at public meetings.
2. We are not in kindergarten. We do not need to be told how to behave. This is so embarrassing for him, actually for all of us, to have our government “leader” telling us to go play nice in the sandbox.
3. He himself does not behave in a civil manner at all times, and even though he winds up being apologetic he will do it again and again and again. Some of the many examples of his uncivil behavior are listed in earlier posts on this thread.
4. The Deputy Mayor is a million times worse than the Mayor. He absolutely cannot keep his hot temper in check and he makes snide comments on a regular basis. He is everything that a leader, a public figure, should NOT be. He really is so much lower than the Mayor.
5. Councilwoman Hauck is, likewise, quite capable of spitting venom and sarcasm from the dais and she does it often.

All in all, this meeting is a ridiculous folly. Paul must want to posture as a great peacemaker, a world diplomat. Forget it Mr. Mayor. You have set the tone with your horrible group of three, you guys are nasty and vindictive, way WAY worse than anyone who speaks up at meetings.

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Reader says Mr. Aronsohn – you made your bed, now lie in it

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file photo by Boyd Loving

Reader says Mr. Aronsohn – you made your bed, now lie in it.

So let me get this perfectly straight, after Mayor Aronsohn and his 2 sidekicks have PUBLICLY:

1) Belittled Tom Riche, accusing him of an inappropriate business relationship with the Village
2) Accused former Councilwoman Bernadette Walsh of trying to get a parking ticket fixed
3) Conducted a scathing performance review of former Village Manager Kenneth Gabbert which led to his firing
4) Interrogated Police Chief John Ward insinuating that he violated a number of Village policies by hiring 2 new police officers. Then, after the Chief was cleared of any wrongdoing by the Bergen County Prosecutor’s Office, refusing to offer an apology of any sort
5) Lashed out at numerous taxpayers during the public comment section of Council meetings (Marsha Ringle, Ellie Gruber, Anne Loving, Boyd Loving, Ron Verdicchio, William Corcoran, Frank Delvecchio, and more)

Now all of a sudden they’re asking for “Civility in our Public Discourse?”

Message to you Mr. Aronsohn – you made your bed, now lie in it.

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Civility in our public discourse or Silencing Dissent

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file photo Boyd Loving

Civility in our public discourse or Silencing Dissent

Friends / Colleagues —

I am writing to invite you to a meeting to discuss the need for more civility in our public discourse.   The meeting will be Monday, November 24 at 7:30pm in Village Hall.

Specifically, we would like to begin a community-wide conversation about ways in which we can elevate public discourse and improve the way in which people publicly treat each other … whether it be at a Council meeting … on a ball field … in an online discussion … or anywhere else.

Joining me to lead this informal meeting will be Councilwoman Gwenn Hauck, Rev. Jan Philips and Rabbi David Fine.

Please let me know if you can join us and if you think someone else should be invited, too.   In fact, please share this invitation with those who you think should attend, but please keep me posted so that I can keep track of those planning to attend.

Thanks very much.

Paul

Paul Aronsohn, Mayor
@paularonsohn

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